That’s a terribly awkward position to be put in. I’ve had to do shows with people I’m dating, and truthfully, I think it’s the worst.
The first questionI would ask you is did you confront him in private first? I’m not taking his side, I think it was a dick move and I’d be pissed as hell, but actors can be sensitive. I’ve learned their feelings tend to get hurt about forty times faster than my crew’s would. So next time, I suggest pulling him aside and of he doesn’t listen then I’d beat him up, but that’s me and I have violent impulses (that I only sometimes act on. Just kidding I’ve never hit an actor).
Also I suggest that if there’s a possibility of you two (if you’re still together or even if not) doing any other show together, that you talk to him. Explain that when you walk into the theatre he’s not your boyfriend anymore, he’s an actor and you’re a stage manager, and nothing that happens during a show/rehearsal is personal, you’re just doing your job and it’s his job to listen. If he can’t respect that and you then he’s not very mature, he’s not professional, and personally, he wouldn’t really be worth your time. But then again, I don’t know the guy.
Of course, I’m not saying you have to break up because of a show, and you’re obvious welcome to ignore my advice all together. But I’m being honest, you shouldn’t have to go to work (or whatever sm-ing is to you) and have to worry about your boyfriend being an asshole, and then getting all huffy like a child when you do your job. In the end though, I hope you just do what’s best for you.
Something happened today that made me think of this post. So I had to reblog it.